Thursday, October 3, 2013

Saying Goodbye...

Goodbyes come in many forms.  Some are temporary.  Some are permanent.  Some are a good things. Some rip your heart out...

Today I said goodbye to my best friend of 14 years.  We've been through a lot together.  He was there for me when my parents got divorced, then when I met Robert.  Throughout high school and in college. When I lived by myself and was scared to death he was there to protect me.  He came with me when I got married and moved  to Vicksburg.  He has protected both my girls as they have grown up over the last seven years. He allowed them to ride on his back, dress him in tutus and boas, and lay on him when they were sick.  He had nothing but unconditional love for me and those closest to me and never asked anything in return.

Over the last week he has been unable to stand and walk.  His back legs gave out after 14 years.  The vet gave him a shot and medication but said that his quality of life was not good.  He stopped eating and drinking and starting using the restroom on himself.  Through all that, he always gave me those same loving eyes.  I knew it was time but I couldn't make that decision. I felt I was killing him. He had no voice to say how much pain he was in but he also had no voice to say how much he wanted to live.

I know this was the right decision but it hurts so much. It seems everywhere I turn around I see him.  In Brianna's room at the foot of her bed protecting her, in the living room watching over the girls as they play, in the kitchen trying to get a little taste of what is for dinner.

I know I am rambling and to some of y'all he is just a dog. But to me and my family he was so much more. He was my protector, my confidant, my best friend.  So today I say goodbye Dubya...I miss you and will love you forever