Soooo I know I haven't posted in a while. Sorry, I really am not good at this whole blogging and writing thing. Every time I think, "Oooh, I got something I can blog about," I either say I will do it later because I am tired or have something else that needs to be done OR mainly I talk myself out of it because I feel it probably won't mean anything to anyone but me and people will think I am stupid. People pleaser. That's me.
Not sure if this is a blessing or a curse. Maybe a little of both. I strive to do everything I think people expect from me. Be everything they want me to be. I wanna be that person that no one has anything bad to say about. The person whose character is never judged. I wanna be the person that people look at and say, "Yea, I've heard about her. She's got a good heart, such a sweet girl".
How selfish of me.
How foolish of me.
How ignorant of me.
I am human. I mess up. Over. And over. And over. And over again. I say things I shouldn't. I do things I shouldn't. And then I beat myself up about what I have done or said. Ever been there? It's a vicious cycle. And I think, "Jesus would've never done that, or said that, or thought that." Jesus would please everyone. But He didn't. And we shouldn't. It's not about pleasing others. It's about pleasing God.
Now this doesn't mean that we forget about others. But I think through pleasing Him, you can't help but care and love for others. But this doesn't necessarily mean you will please them. Some people you just can't please no matter what. Sometimes these people may not need to be in your life for a season or longer. It's OK to not be liked by everyone. Repeat that (mainly me), "It's OK to not be liked by everyone."
Our purpose is not to be here on earth to please others. Our purpose is to glorify God and spread His message through all that we do. And that's what I'm working toward. I'm trying so hard to be a woman after God's own heart. And when I mess up, and I'm going to mess up, I will remember this quote by John Newton...
I am not what I ought to be, I am not what I want to be, I am not what I hope to be in another
world; but still I am not what I once used to be, and by the grace of God I am what I am."
Thank you God for continuously working in my life